Sarah, Sick for Four Days
I rarely get sick. I only get colds around 1-2 times a year, and even when my hyperacidity strikes it only renders me immobile for a few hours. Migraine headaches are pretty frequent, but nothing a couple of Advil and several hours of sleep can't cure.
But this. O-hoho. This, whatever it is, is a biggie. Big, and downright weird. Read full post...
Monday
Because of a fun but exhausting weekend with friends, family, and ministry, Monday morning found me exhausted. I woke up with a good mood but heavy muscles. The clock told me that I was late for work, and the rain was pouring outside. Classic. So I decided to stay home. "Best not to get sick," I had said. So monday was rest day. Woohoo.
But I ended up working on side projects, anyway. But at least I was in the comfort of my bed.
Tuesday
I woke up feeling sort of okay... The weather was better, so I said, "Up and at 'em!" By the time I got to work, I was still feeling not quite normal, but I was on my way there, right? Wrong.
Lunchtime found me without energy and appettite. My officemates told me to go home. I really wanted to do just that, but I didn't want to travel for one and a half hours by myself when I was feeling sick. That afternoon, I was having chills and I was lightheaded. When six o'clock finally came, I went home with Ana, thank God for her, and our travel went without incident.
I crashed on my bed at eight, after light dinner.
Wednesday
I woke up with a HUGE headache. Not a migraine one, with which I'm very well acquainted. Just a "normal" headache, only it's really...well...painful. It was so bad that I didn't have the mind to call in sick for work.
Felt better in the afternoon, and went to sleep early again, hoping for a full recovery.
Thursday (Today)
Finally feeling better, but now the stomach thing is back. One minute I feel like retching, and in the next I feel perfectly fine. Arrrrrrrgh. I feel too sick to be useful, but too well to be useless. And ARGH I hate it.
So now here I am, still in bed, trying to get really really well-rested so I can go back to work tomorrow. It'll be Friday, so in case I'll get sick (again), I have the weekend.
My mom tells me that I've been working too hard (real job+side projects). Add that to the rainy weather and travel to and from work, and you get a Sarah with very low resistance to sickness. Meh. It's logical, I guess, but...MEH!
But this. O-hoho. This, whatever it is, is a biggie. Big, and downright weird. Read full post...
Monday
Because of a fun but exhausting weekend with friends, family, and ministry, Monday morning found me exhausted. I woke up with a good mood but heavy muscles. The clock told me that I was late for work, and the rain was pouring outside. Classic. So I decided to stay home. "Best not to get sick," I had said. So monday was rest day. Woohoo.
But I ended up working on side projects, anyway. But at least I was in the comfort of my bed.
Tuesday
I woke up feeling sort of okay... The weather was better, so I said, "Up and at 'em!" By the time I got to work, I was still feeling not quite normal, but I was on my way there, right? Wrong.
Lunchtime found me without energy and appettite. My officemates told me to go home. I really wanted to do just that, but I didn't want to travel for one and a half hours by myself when I was feeling sick. That afternoon, I was having chills and I was lightheaded. When six o'clock finally came, I went home with Ana, thank God for her, and our travel went without incident.
I crashed on my bed at eight, after light dinner.
Wednesday
I woke up with a HUGE headache. Not a migraine one, with which I'm very well acquainted. Just a "normal" headache, only it's really...well...painful. It was so bad that I didn't have the mind to call in sick for work.
Felt better in the afternoon, and went to sleep early again, hoping for a full recovery.
Thursday (Today)
Finally feeling better, but now the stomach thing is back. One minute I feel like retching, and in the next I feel perfectly fine. Arrrrrrrgh. I feel too sick to be useful, but too well to be useless. And ARGH I hate it.
So now here I am, still in bed, trying to get really really well-rested so I can go back to work tomorrow. It'll be Friday, so in case I'll get sick (again), I have the weekend.
My mom tells me that I've been working too hard (real job+side projects). Add that to the rainy weather and travel to and from work, and you get a Sarah with very low resistance to sickness. Meh. It's logical, I guess, but...MEH!
Labels: general, life, randomness
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Monday, April 30, 2007
currently version whatever
Mood
Still swamped at work, as always. Though what I'm doing now isn't what I usually do, I'm still working my butt off. Arrr. But hey, as much as I complain sometimes, I'm not complaining.
Reading
A lot of things, actually. There's a handful of unfinished books in my shelf, although nearly half of them, I've finished reading once before, like The Hobbit. The Lupin books are in my PC, though. I wish I was reading The Tower of Geburah again. I don't know why, but with the brewing talk of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows, I suddenly missed Geburah. Hm. I don't know the connection, though... Magic, maybe?
Watching
Prison Break - Blame it on Scofield. Season 3 won't start til September... Rawrrrrrr.
RomeoxJuliet - Probably the only anime I'm watching right now. Hehe.
Heroes - Prison Break kind of dethroned this from the top of my "addicted to" list, probably because they keep taking them so-called breaks. The season's ending in a few weeks, I think, since Episode 20's coming out tomorrow... I'm sure the season ender's going to be a cliffie, and then the next season won't be for several months again. Argh.
Lost - I'm kind of beginning to lose interest, actually. Partly because of Prison Break, partly because I'm a Jate fan. Hihihi.
Listening to
Phantom Planet, Michael Buble, Jason Mraz, and Duncan Shiek on repeat play. but I'm kind of looking into Carpenters songs because my brother said it's the right range for me. Plus I discovered that I can sing Carpenters songs almost flawlessly in front of an audience, even with a migraine pounding my head.
Eating
Nothing. I enjoyed myself too much with my Tofu Steak lunch. ^_^
Drinking
C2. What else?
Writing
For the first time in almost four years.... I'm writing Java code. Surprising, I know. Java was my favorite PL in my sophomore year (and still is, I guess), but it's been four freakin' years since I did any programming! It feels silly to be researching on the foundational classes all over again. *sigh*
Wishing
That holidays are holidays for me, too.
Still swamped at work, as always. Though what I'm doing now isn't what I usually do, I'm still working my butt off. Arrr. But hey, as much as I complain sometimes, I'm not complaining.
Reading
A lot of things, actually. There's a handful of unfinished books in my shelf, although nearly half of them, I've finished reading once before, like The Hobbit. The Lupin books are in my PC, though. I wish I was reading The Tower of Geburah again. I don't know why, but with the brewing talk of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hollows, I suddenly missed Geburah. Hm. I don't know the connection, though... Magic, maybe?
Watching
Prison Break - Blame it on Scofield. Season 3 won't start til September... Rawrrrrrr.
RomeoxJuliet - Probably the only anime I'm watching right now. Hehe.
Heroes - Prison Break kind of dethroned this from the top of my "addicted to" list, probably because they keep taking them so-called breaks. The season's ending in a few weeks, I think, since Episode 20's coming out tomorrow... I'm sure the season ender's going to be a cliffie, and then the next season won't be for several months again. Argh.
Lost - I'm kind of beginning to lose interest, actually. Partly because of Prison Break, partly because I'm a Jate fan. Hihihi.
Listening to
Phantom Planet, Michael Buble, Jason Mraz, and Duncan Shiek on repeat play. but I'm kind of looking into Carpenters songs because my brother said it's the right range for me. Plus I discovered that I can sing Carpenters songs almost flawlessly in front of an audience, even with a migraine pounding my head.
Eating
Nothing. I enjoyed myself too much with my Tofu Steak lunch. ^_^
Drinking
C2. What else?
Writing
For the first time in almost four years.... I'm writing Java code. Surprising, I know. Java was my favorite PL in my sophomore year (and still is, I guess), but it's been four freakin' years since I did any programming! It feels silly to be researching on the foundational classes all over again. *sigh*
Wishing
That holidays are holidays for me, too.
Labels: general
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Sunday, January 14, 2007
level up
At the start of the year, I was excited for our annual 7-day prayer and fasting, because, aside from the more obvious reasons, this was going to be my first time to do it as a single professional. There was so many new things to pray for!
But as I was preparing, I found that I didn't know what to pray for.
As a student, it was easy: academic excellence, favor from (terror) teachers, a bigger allowance... As a professional, I guess the equivalent could be excellence in my work, favor from bosses, and a raise in my salary. Or, in one word: promotion.
But I thought: it was way too early to ask for a promotion. After all, this was my first job in the field that I graduated from, and I've only been working in the office for three months. I wasn't even regularized yet!
Still, I decided to pray for it. "God," I said, "thank you for the promotion you're going to give me... sometime within this year..."
The prayer and fasting started. And, for the first six days, my quiet time was...
...
quiet.
I didn't hear anything special from God; There was no musical band and fireworks in the background while a revelation dawned on me. Nothing special really happened; There was no action-packed sequence of unbelievable events.
It was just... normal.
But I guess there's nothing wrong with that.
On the seventh day, Thursday, I read this scripture: I will praise to the Lord according to his righteousness, and will sing praise to the name of the LORD most high. That made me realize that it's not about what I will hear from God, it's not about what God will do for me. It's about Him.
His righteousness, Him that is worthy of praise, His name that is most high.
I was grinning for hours. (See previous post for more details.) I thought: WOW. This was it. Solb na 'ko. I can end prayer and fasting on a high note. That made my week. I'll feel awesome today even if nothing else happened...
Well, haha for me.
At the office in the same day, a group of us, our CEO included, were talking about this department that we were going to set up soon. Well, actually, we were already setting it up.
To my shock and amazement, my boss asked me, a three-month-old employee, to be the head of that department.
...
Head of the friggin' department!!!!
I just nodded, smiling. But needless to say, I was jumping up in down in my head. I SO did not expect that. Sure, I'd been praying for promotion, but I had NO idea that it was going to happen so soon!
But God did.
He planned it all along.
So, friends, I encourage you: believe God for great things. Because he has even greater things in mind for you.
----
On a side note: my department is in web design. The one reason I took up Computer Science in the first place.
But as I was preparing, I found that I didn't know what to pray for.
As a student, it was easy: academic excellence, favor from (terror) teachers, a bigger allowance... As a professional, I guess the equivalent could be excellence in my work, favor from bosses, and a raise in my salary. Or, in one word: promotion.
But I thought: it was way too early to ask for a promotion. After all, this was my first job in the field that I graduated from, and I've only been working in the office for three months. I wasn't even regularized yet!
Still, I decided to pray for it. "God," I said, "thank you for the promotion you're going to give me... sometime within this year..."
The prayer and fasting started. And, for the first six days, my quiet time was...
...
quiet.
I didn't hear anything special from God; There was no musical band and fireworks in the background while a revelation dawned on me. Nothing special really happened; There was no action-packed sequence of unbelievable events.
It was just... normal.
But I guess there's nothing wrong with that.
On the seventh day, Thursday, I read this scripture: I will praise to the Lord according to his righteousness, and will sing praise to the name of the LORD most high. That made me realize that it's not about what I will hear from God, it's not about what God will do for me. It's about Him.
His righteousness, Him that is worthy of praise, His name that is most high.
I was grinning for hours. (See previous post for more details.) I thought: WOW. This was it. Solb na 'ko. I can end prayer and fasting on a high note. That made my week. I'll feel awesome today even if nothing else happened...
Well, haha for me.
At the office in the same day, a group of us, our CEO included, were talking about this department that we were going to set up soon. Well, actually, we were already setting it up.
To my shock and amazement, my boss asked me, a three-month-old employee, to be the head of that department.
...
Head of the friggin' department!!!!
I just nodded, smiling. But needless to say, I was jumping up in down in my head. I SO did not expect that. Sure, I'd been praying for promotion, but I had NO idea that it was going to happen so soon!
But God did.
He planned it all along.
So, friends, I encourage you: believe God for great things. Because he has even greater things in mind for you.
----
On a side note: my department is in web design. The one reason I took up Computer Science in the first place.
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Thursday, January 11, 2007
paulit-ulit-ulit-ulit-ulit
Argh. I read this this short, simple sentence this morning just after waking up. And I can't get it out of my head.
Not that I'm trying, mind you.
And I'm not complaining, either.
It sort of struck me as weird that even though I've heard and read this verse a hundred times already, this is the first time that it had this effect on me. That's why I knew I had to share it with everyone I know.
At first glance, it may seem that the verse's focus is on the "I". Hm. Then again, maybe it is. But for me, for today, the focus is on that four-letter word in caps.
The LORD.
It is HE that is righteous.
It's HIM that I will praise.
It's HIM that is most high.
And HE is pleased when I praise HIM.
It hit me like a 10-wheeler truck. Yes, we already know it, as we always sing it in church every week, and we hear it from our leaders and pastors all the time. But we have to be reminded every day.
Not just re-mind-ed, but re-heart-ed.
Yes, I know there is no such word in the English dictionary. Sue me.
But, really. We have to take it to heart every day. Every single second of every single minute of every single day. And when we take that truth to heart, you'll be like me, in one way or another: grinning like a giddy schoolgirl. Like that teen-ager whose long-time crush spoke to while he flashed his winning smile at her. Yeah, that's what I feel like right now.
Only better.
WAY better.
Not that I'm trying, mind you.
And I'm not complaining, either.
I will praise the LORD according to his righteousness: and will sing praise to the name of the LORD most high.
Psalms 7:17
It sort of struck me as weird that even though I've heard and read this verse a hundred times already, this is the first time that it had this effect on me. That's why I knew I had to share it with everyone I know.
At first glance, it may seem that the verse's focus is on the "I". Hm. Then again, maybe it is. But for me, for today, the focus is on that four-letter word in caps.
The LORD.
It is HE that is righteous.
It's HIM that I will praise.
It's HIM that is most high.
And HE is pleased when I praise HIM.
It hit me like a 10-wheeler truck. Yes, we already know it, as we always sing it in church every week, and we hear it from our leaders and pastors all the time. But we have to be reminded every day.
Not just re-mind-ed, but re-heart-ed.
Yes, I know there is no such word in the English dictionary. Sue me.
But, really. We have to take it to heart every day. Every single second of every single minute of every single day. And when we take that truth to heart, you'll be like me, in one way or another: grinning like a giddy schoolgirl. Like that teen-ager whose long-time crush spoke to while he flashed his winning smile at her. Yeah, that's what I feel like right now.
Only better.
WAY better.
Labels: general
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Friday, December 22, 2006
diamond
I can compare it to a diamond.
A diamond, although it is one clear, honest, beautiful stone, has many facets. From different angles, the same stone looks different. It can be sharp and smooth, depending where you touch it. It reflects light to different directions in different colors.
That's how I am.
Like a diamond.
Put in different situations, I act differently. Grouped with different people, I talk differently. Access my numerous different blogs, and I say different things. But I never contradict myself. Or, at least, I hope not. I am Sarah, still the same, Sarah, but it's just that, when you're looking at me from a different angle, you'll see a different side. It's not that I'm leading a double life. It's not that I'm hiding things from different people. It's not that I don't want a life of integrity and honesty. But it's just that there's more to me than just... well... whatever you know me as.
We can't box people up and say that, "Oh this person is like this." and that's it. People are beautiful creations of God who are simple, and, at the same time, complex. We might think we already know one person inside out, but then, every day, we discover something new about her.
Just as the diamond. We think we know exactly what it looks like. But, looking at it again, we discover a different side we've never seen before.
That's how we are, that's how we all are.
Like diamonds.Labels: general
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Tuesday, December 12, 2006
tearing down walls
In networking, a firewall is a logical barrier designed to prevent unauthorized communication within a computer network. Its basic purpose is to control information traffic between computer networks with various zones of trust. The Internet, for example, is a high-risk zone. On the other hand, a local network is a zone with high trust. (Supposedly, anyway.) Proper management of the firewall demands skill from the firewall administrator. In the hands of the administrator, a firewall can be rendered powerful, or become useless as a security tool.
I have my own firewall. Not just in my PC, but within myself. We all do, whether or not we realize it. We use our firewall to share our lives to others, or to block out aspects of ourselves that we wish to keep private. Even though we wish to think that we are friendly people, we still have firewalls. And just because we're open to others, it doesn't mean that we actually are open.
Take me, for example. People always tell me that I'm such a cheerful, approachable, friendly person. And I am. They say that if you sit down with me, you'll know my life story in the span of more or less half an hour. That's probably pretty accurate. I ask questions to the people I meet, and I answer queries with a smile that people tend to find contagious.
But does that mean that I'm completely open to everyone?
Not really.
We all need firewalls.
Even me.
An open book, I may be. A transparent girl, I may be. But there are just some things that just can't be disclosed to certain people at certain times.
So, when you discover that there are some things I don't share to you, even though you're one of my close friends, please don't get angry. Don't try to brutally tear down the walls, just because I'm supposed to be 'open'. Don't suddenly think that I don't have enough confidence in you. Because I do. I have confidence that you can wait for me to grant you access. Just as I'm confident that, someday, you'll grant me access to the hidden sectors of your mind.
And please, if you can... Please try to see if there are things that I've been trying to show you. Sometimes, I'm already allowing you to pass through the barrier, you're just not paying enough attention.
Because, before you know it, the opportunity to see through me might be gone.
I have my own firewall. Not just in my PC, but within myself. We all do, whether or not we realize it. We use our firewall to share our lives to others, or to block out aspects of ourselves that we wish to keep private. Even though we wish to think that we are friendly people, we still have firewalls. And just because we're open to others, it doesn't mean that we actually are open.
Take me, for example. People always tell me that I'm such a cheerful, approachable, friendly person. And I am. They say that if you sit down with me, you'll know my life story in the span of more or less half an hour. That's probably pretty accurate. I ask questions to the people I meet, and I answer queries with a smile that people tend to find contagious.
But does that mean that I'm completely open to everyone?
Not really.
We all need firewalls.
Even me.
An open book, I may be. A transparent girl, I may be. But there are just some things that just can't be disclosed to certain people at certain times.
So, when you discover that there are some things I don't share to you, even though you're one of my close friends, please don't get angry. Don't try to brutally tear down the walls, just because I'm supposed to be 'open'. Don't suddenly think that I don't have enough confidence in you. Because I do. I have confidence that you can wait for me to grant you access. Just as I'm confident that, someday, you'll grant me access to the hidden sectors of your mind.
And please, if you can... Please try to see if there are things that I've been trying to show you. Sometimes, I'm already allowing you to pass through the barrier, you're just not paying enough attention.
Because, before you know it, the opportunity to see through me might be gone.
Labels: general
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Monday, November 13, 2006
currently...
things that I'm doing
1. making a website
2. studying...stuff for work
3. downloading manga and anime while working
4. watching anime and reading manga during lunch break
5. writing KoS
things I'm wishing for
1. a new flash drive (my old one disappeared)
2. a tablet
3. lots and LOTS of CDs to put my new downloads in
4. a car (and proper driving lessons before then)
5. world peace!
things that I miss
1. my grandma
2. stargazing
3. week-ends
4. percussion freaks
5. goofing off in starbucks
things that piss me off
1. inconsiderate drivers
2. jaywalkers
3. spam in my email
4. selfish, inconsiderate, insensitive idiots who insult things I like in front of me (and they know I like it) just because they don't like it themselves. [i mean, sheesh! keep it to yourself or just bash it when i'm not around!!!! >_<] 5. people pestering me, asking me when i'm gonna get married (i'm only twenty-freakin'-two years old!!! lay off, why dontcha?!)
things that make me happy
1. chibi heads with razor eyes and jagged teeth
2. Eikoku Monogatari Emma
3. Kyou Kara Maou
4. my mp3s
5. my job
-----
seems I'm too much into enumerating things, recently, eh?
1. making a website
2. studying...stuff for work
3. downloading manga and anime while working
4. watching anime and reading manga during lunch break
5. writing KoS
things I'm wishing for
1. a new flash drive (my old one disappeared)
2. a tablet
3. lots and LOTS of CDs to put my new downloads in
4. a car (and proper driving lessons before then)
5. world peace!
things that I miss
1. my grandma
2. stargazing
3. week-ends
4. percussion freaks
5. goofing off in starbucks
things that piss me off
1. inconsiderate drivers
2. jaywalkers
3. spam in my email
4. selfish, inconsiderate, insensitive idiots who insult things I like in front of me (and they know I like it) just because they don't like it themselves. [i mean, sheesh! keep it to yourself or just bash it when i'm not around!!!! >_<] 5. people pestering me, asking me when i'm gonna get married (i'm only twenty-freakin'-two years old!!! lay off, why dontcha?!)
things that make me happy
1. chibi heads with razor eyes and jagged teeth
2. Eikoku Monogatari Emma
3. Kyou Kara Maou
4. my mp3s
5. my job
-----
seems I'm too much into enumerating things, recently, eh?
Labels: general
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Thursday, October 19, 2006
VII
Did a long-overdue blogsurfing and stumbled on this quiz that I was supposed to have taken ages ago.
-----
Seven things that scare you:
1. Cockroaches
2. Cockroaches
3. Cockroaches
4. - 7. and... four (or more) cockroaches?
Seven things you like the most:
1. Family & Friends
2. Pasta
3. Music
4. Fiction
5. December weather
6. blue + STARZZZZZ
7. CHOKLIT
Seven important things in your bedroom:
1. Clothes
2. MP3 Player
3. Computer
4. Notebook
5. Pens/Pencils
6. Guitar
7. Cellphone
Seven random facts about you:
1. I have selective memory.
2. I have conversations with the programs I make.
3. I'm good at so many things, I don't know what exactly I do best.
4. I get migraines from one of the things that make me über happy.
5. i'm a woman of symmetry.
6. i'm a woman of symmetry, yet none my drawings are symmetrical.
7. I LOVE the smell of coffee, yet I only like coffee.
Seven things you plan to do before you die:
1. Tour the Philippines. On foot.
2. Go to at least 7 different countries
3. Go to at least 1 mission trip
4. Be fluent in at least one language aside from English and Filipino
5. Get married & have kids
6. Master an instrument
7. Be rich
Seven things you can do:
1. Sing
2. Speak English really really well
3. Write in English really really well
4. Develop websites
5. Type at 72 WPM with 98% accuracy
6. Play the guitar, piano and a little bit of violin
7. Color in Photoshop
Seven things you can't do:
1. Whistle
2. Wear sleeveless tops (not yet, anyway. let's see 5years from now)
3. NOT wear lip balm
4. Write in text lingo if I'm not in a hurry
5. Seriously sing Christmas songs before December comes
6. Speak another Filipino language >_<
Seven things that attract you to the opposite sex:
1. Faith
2. Character
3. Personality
4. Smile
5. Eyes
6. Voice
7. Confidence
Seven things you say the most:
1. Good morning!!!
2. Nyaaa
3. Rawr
4. So...yeah.
5. Hao
6. Astiiiiiiiig!!!
7. Oh, puh-leeze
Seven celeb crushes (whether local or foreign):
1. Yamaguchi Kappei because he's Ranma
2. Midorikawa Hikaru because his voice is super cool and versatile
3. Rico Blanco because of his songwriting prowess
4. Ewan McGregor. Act na, sing pa!
5. Brendan Fraser because so dashingly debonairedly hilarious
6. Keanu Reeves because he's... Keanu Reeves. :love:
7. Johnny Depp. Period.
Seven people you want to see to take this quiz:
Anyone who wants to.
-----
Seven things that scare you:
1. Cockroaches
2. Cockroaches
3. Cockroaches
4. - 7. and... four (or more) cockroaches?
Seven things you like the most:
1. Family & Friends
2. Pasta
3. Music
4. Fiction
5. December weather
6. blue + STARZZZZZ
7. CHOKLIT
Seven important things in your bedroom:
1. Clothes
2. MP3 Player
3. Computer
4. Notebook
5. Pens/Pencils
6. Guitar
7. Cellphone
Seven random facts about you:
1. I have selective memory.
2. I have conversations with the programs I make.
3. I'm good at so many things, I don't know what exactly I do best.
4. I get migraines from one of the things that make me über happy.
5. i'm a woman of symmetry.
6. i'm a woman of symmetry, yet none my drawings are symmetrical.
7. I LOVE the smell of coffee, yet I only like coffee.
Seven things you plan to do before you die:
1. Tour the Philippines. On foot.
2. Go to at least 7 different countries
3. Go to at least 1 mission trip
4. Be fluent in at least one language aside from English and Filipino
5. Get married & have kids
6. Master an instrument
7. Be rich
Seven things you can do:
1. Sing
2. Speak English really really well
3. Write in English really really well
4. Develop websites
5. Type at 72 WPM with 98% accuracy
6. Play the guitar, piano and a little bit of violin
7. Color in Photoshop
Seven things you can't do:
1. Whistle
2. Wear sleeveless tops (not yet, anyway. let's see 5years from now)
3. NOT wear lip balm
4. Write in text lingo if I'm not in a hurry
5. Seriously sing Christmas songs before December comes
6. Speak another Filipino language >_<
Seven things that attract you to the opposite sex:
1. Faith
2. Character
3. Personality
4. Smile
5. Eyes
6. Voice
7. Confidence
Seven things you say the most:
1. Good morning!!!
2. Nyaaa
3. Rawr
4. So...yeah.
5. Hao
6. Astiiiiiiiig!!!
7. Oh, puh-leeze
Seven celeb crushes (whether local or foreign):
1. Yamaguchi Kappei because he's Ranma
2. Midorikawa Hikaru because his voice is super cool and versatile
3. Rico Blanco because of his songwriting prowess
4. Ewan McGregor. Act na, sing pa!
5. Brendan Fraser because so dashingly debonairedly hilarious
6. Keanu Reeves because he's... Keanu Reeves. :love:
7. Johnny Depp. Period.
Seven people you want to see to take this quiz:
Anyone who wants to.
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Friday, September 23, 2005
'tis the coward's way
The past month, being our "birthday month", as we call it, was fun. There's no denying that. Expecially last Saturday. My goodness, I think that can qualify to be in my list of "The Best Days of My Life. EVER."
But that was last week.
Let's be precise for a minute, here. Yes, yes, I know I haven't been blogging for the longest time, and, believe me, I've wanted to write, and there's been so much to write about I didn't know where to start. However, I'm writing this blog entry about what I'm feeling today, at this hour, at this minute, at this very second. It's one of those moments that I wish to be blunt, direct, and honest to the point of being harsh and pessimistic. Ignore me if you must.
I'm a pretty visual person, so I'll do this visually. I feel like I'm walking in a beautiful, mysterious garden that's practically begging me to explore it. There are flowers everywhere, and the butterflies flying around me, unafraid of my presence. The skies are blue, the sun is shining, and the white clouds are as fluffy as you can make them. There's beautiful music playing from who-knows-where, and everything seems fine and dandy. That is, if we ignore the thorns I happen to walk on accassionally.
Life is that way, I suppose. There are thorns you have to step on every now and then to shape your character, to build you up and to make you a more disciplined, patient person. They're like the refining fire through which gold have to be faced with, so that their luster and beauty can be unveiled. These are thorns, trials and them freaking problems we have to face with. Those that make life's beautiful moments look more beautiful.
Yes, I know that they're important to me and to my growth. Some thorns are so sharp they make me cry out, but then after enduring the pain, it'll be gone. Honestly, I'd rather every problem was like that. But then, there are the ones that are sharp, but at the same time not, that give you a pain of sorts, but not quite. It doesn't hurt. Not really. But it makes you mighty uncomfortable. And what's worse is it wonn't go away for a long, long time. It's that little pebble that got in your shoe that makes you wince whenever step on it. It's that piece of corn between the teeth in the back of your mouth that you just can get out.
It's one of those things that I bear with, but, sooner or later, will make me want to scream my lungs out in frustration. Or just find a deep, dark hole to crawl into so that no one and nothing can bother me. I know it's the coward's way: not facing the challenges as they come. That's me right now, to be completely honest.
Right now, I just wish everything would just...disappear.
I think it's just the knowledge that there's something great that's coming for me, and the faith that everything's temporary, that makes me hold on -- no matter how weak my grip may be. That's what lets me smile and look like nothing's wrong when I'm outside. And then, finally, when I'm in my room and there's no one who can see me but the King, I just fall on my knees and brokenly admit that I'm not so strong, that I'm not OK, and that I want to give up. Finally I can have the courage to surrender everything to Him.
And then that'll be His cue to show me for the millionth time just how magnificently powerful He is.
But that was last week.
Let's be precise for a minute, here. Yes, yes, I know I haven't been blogging for the longest time, and, believe me, I've wanted to write, and there's been so much to write about I didn't know where to start. However, I'm writing this blog entry about what I'm feeling today, at this hour, at this minute, at this very second. It's one of those moments that I wish to be blunt, direct, and honest to the point of being harsh and pessimistic. Ignore me if you must.
I'm a pretty visual person, so I'll do this visually. I feel like I'm walking in a beautiful, mysterious garden that's practically begging me to explore it. There are flowers everywhere, and the butterflies flying around me, unafraid of my presence. The skies are blue, the sun is shining, and the white clouds are as fluffy as you can make them. There's beautiful music playing from who-knows-where, and everything seems fine and dandy. That is, if we ignore the thorns I happen to walk on accassionally.
Life is that way, I suppose. There are thorns you have to step on every now and then to shape your character, to build you up and to make you a more disciplined, patient person. They're like the refining fire through which gold have to be faced with, so that their luster and beauty can be unveiled. These are thorns, trials and them freaking problems we have to face with. Those that make life's beautiful moments look more beautiful.
Yes, I know that they're important to me and to my growth. Some thorns are so sharp they make me cry out, but then after enduring the pain, it'll be gone. Honestly, I'd rather every problem was like that. But then, there are the ones that are sharp, but at the same time not, that give you a pain of sorts, but not quite. It doesn't hurt. Not really. But it makes you mighty uncomfortable. And what's worse is it wonn't go away for a long, long time. It's that little pebble that got in your shoe that makes you wince whenever step on it. It's that piece of corn between the teeth in the back of your mouth that you just can get out.
It's one of those things that I bear with, but, sooner or later, will make me want to scream my lungs out in frustration. Or just find a deep, dark hole to crawl into so that no one and nothing can bother me. I know it's the coward's way: not facing the challenges as they come. That's me right now, to be completely honest.
Right now, I just wish everything would just...disappear.
I think it's just the knowledge that there's something great that's coming for me, and the faith that everything's temporary, that makes me hold on -- no matter how weak my grip may be. That's what lets me smile and look like nothing's wrong when I'm outside. And then, finally, when I'm in my room and there's no one who can see me but the King, I just fall on my knees and brokenly admit that I'm not so strong, that I'm not OK, and that I want to give up. Finally I can have the courage to surrender everything to Him.
And then that'll be His cue to show me for the millionth time just how magnificently powerful He is.
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Friday, August 12, 2005
fuyusarah's series of ... uh... events
Rawr.
Today was an amusing mix of rain, tardiness, frustration, rain, bowling pins, accidents, rain, Deutsche, kids, and...more rain.
I woke up at 6:00 am today to go to Pisay. The sophomores had a recollection, and I was to help out. Some of you might not know why, but it felt really ironic to me that I'm helping out Pisay students. In Pisay. Ha. But I suppose it'll be nothing compared to how ironic it'll be when -- IF -- I help out in Kiko High.
...
I got there at 8 am, and it felt really weird, not knowing what to do in a foreign land (that's happened way too many times this sem, by the way). I entered the classroom where I was assigned, and found 6 kids. Picture me getting a sweatdrop on my head. After introducing myself, I go, "Kayo lang ba sa room na to?"
"Hindi po..."
'Po'. Ugh.
"So...where's everybody else?"
No answer. The kids just exchanged glances.
I look at my copy of the schedule. Says there:
7:00-8:00 Orientation
8:00-10:30 Session 1
10:30-11:00 Merienda
11:00-12:30 Session 2
and so on.
"Uh... Maybe they went to the cafeteria after the orientation?" I suggested.
Glances are exchanged once more. "May orientation po?"
Another sweatdrop.
"Yes. 7-8. Room 301."
Alarm creeping up to their faces, the kids gather their things, mumble hurried "Excuse po" and run out of the room. The rest of the kids, as well as the faculty members we were to work with, arrived at 8:30. Because of other unexpected events beyond my control, I wasn't able to leave Pisay at the time I was supposed to, so I was late in my next appointment: meet someone at UP.
I arrived late for my appointment, but I found out it was OK because he didn't come on time, either. Actually, he didn't come at all. Rargh. So I left UP at 1:00, which makes me late for my next appointment: assist in a class at His Name.
1:30 pm found me frustratingly frustrated on a jeepney bound for Tandang Sora, whose driver seems to think that the heavy rain was a valid reason to drive really slow. I mean, REALLY sloooooooooow. It was.... ARGH. I was supposed to buy bond paper for the office, too, so I went to buy bond paper. Of course, the saleslady HAD to move agonizingly slow.
I mean, it's gotta be a rule, right? People in a hurry MUST be attended to s-l-o-w-l-y.
RAWR!!!!
So I run. In the freakin' pourin' rain, I run. With "Who Needs Shelter" playing in my earphones, I ran as fast as I could, totally thankful that my shoes are really for running, and that my bag was leather, and that my umbrella was sturdy, and that I also had a jacket on. I knew that, by running, I was practically begging to slip, but, thankfully, I didn't.
I saw the office, and I slowed down to a stop, catching my breath. Finally...When I FINALLY sigh and relax (even though I was late for 30 minutes), I took a step forward...
...and slipped.
Let me give you a little background here. From the day I learned to walk to the time I was a kid of about 12 years of age, I was a walking catastrophe. For some reason only God can explain, I have a terrible sense of space. I bump into everything. Literally. I trip at least once a day. Seriously. I break something at least once a month. No exaggeration.
But when I was in high school until now, I rarely have an accident. Yeah, sure I got hit by a car in second year high, I got a major wound which required four stitches on my right hand in my freshman year in college... But other than that, my catastrophic tendencies actually plummeted from 10 to 1. I don't think I've ever slipped during the rain (unless you count those that demands nothing but a small "Whoa!" from me).
That's why I don't think I remembered how painful it was going to be. One second I was looking at the door, the next second a loud gasp escaped from my throat as the world spun, a sharp pain coursed through my spine, and then, suddenly, I was looking at the sky, I couldn't breathe, my eyes stung, I felt drenched all over, and I didn't think I was going to be able to walk again.
Again, no exaggerations.
I swear, it was shock. Jason Mraz was singing the last chorus of "Who Needs Shelter" now. I was clutching my umbrella as if it were my lifeline, and, now that I look back, it was amazing that I was still, in fact, holding my umbrella. My jeans were drenched, but at least my shirt and my head weren't. I sat there for about 30 seconds, but it seriously felt like ages. I was able to get up eventually, but I felt numb all over. I made it to my mom's office without emitting a single sound.
I took a seat. All my mom had to say was "Hi" before tears of pain finally fell. I guess it's one of the things you just can't control after a moment of excruciating pain. I mean, sure, my back didn't hurt anymore, but feeling numb was still scary, even if I had been able to walk. Even now, several hours since my fall, my back's still numb. And I don't think it's because of the bowling I did this afternoon.
Yes, I went bowling with a couple of co-teachers and five German students, but only because I didn't want my day to end with a lousy slip. That was a good decision, too, because I had fun learning German, hitting two strikes, and giving a tour of the mall (here at SM, you've got it all~).
So...yeah. I think I'm gonna go sleep now. Ich bin müde.
Today was an amusing mix of rain, tardiness, frustration, rain, bowling pins, accidents, rain, Deutsche, kids, and...more rain.
I woke up at 6:00 am today to go to Pisay. The sophomores had a recollection, and I was to help out. Some of you might not know why, but it felt really ironic to me that I'm helping out Pisay students. In Pisay. Ha. But I suppose it'll be nothing compared to how ironic it'll be when -- IF -- I help out in Kiko High.
...
I got there at 8 am, and it felt really weird, not knowing what to do in a foreign land (that's happened way too many times this sem, by the way). I entered the classroom where I was assigned, and found 6 kids. Picture me getting a sweatdrop on my head. After introducing myself, I go, "Kayo lang ba sa room na to?"
"Hindi po..."
'Po'. Ugh.
"So...where's everybody else?"
No answer. The kids just exchanged glances.
I look at my copy of the schedule. Says there:
7:00-8:00 Orientation
8:00-10:30 Session 1
10:30-11:00 Merienda
11:00-12:30 Session 2
and so on.
"Uh... Maybe they went to the cafeteria after the orientation?" I suggested.
Glances are exchanged once more. "May orientation po?"
Another sweatdrop.
"Yes. 7-8. Room 301."
Alarm creeping up to their faces, the kids gather their things, mumble hurried "Excuse po" and run out of the room. The rest of the kids, as well as the faculty members we were to work with, arrived at 8:30. Because of other unexpected events beyond my control, I wasn't able to leave Pisay at the time I was supposed to, so I was late in my next appointment: meet someone at UP.
I arrived late for my appointment, but I found out it was OK because he didn't come on time, either. Actually, he didn't come at all. Rargh. So I left UP at 1:00, which makes me late for my next appointment: assist in a class at His Name.
1:30 pm found me frustratingly frustrated on a jeepney bound for Tandang Sora, whose driver seems to think that the heavy rain was a valid reason to drive really slow. I mean, REALLY sloooooooooow. It was.... ARGH. I was supposed to buy bond paper for the office, too, so I went to buy bond paper. Of course, the saleslady HAD to move agonizingly slow.
I mean, it's gotta be a rule, right? People in a hurry MUST be attended to s-l-o-w-l-y.
RAWR!!!!
So I run. In the freakin' pourin' rain, I run. With "Who Needs Shelter" playing in my earphones, I ran as fast as I could, totally thankful that my shoes are really for running, and that my bag was leather, and that my umbrella was sturdy, and that I also had a jacket on. I knew that, by running, I was practically begging to slip, but, thankfully, I didn't.
I saw the office, and I slowed down to a stop, catching my breath. Finally...When I FINALLY sigh and relax (even though I was late for 30 minutes), I took a step forward...
...and slipped.
Let me give you a little background here. From the day I learned to walk to the time I was a kid of about 12 years of age, I was a walking catastrophe. For some reason only God can explain, I have a terrible sense of space. I bump into everything. Literally. I trip at least once a day. Seriously. I break something at least once a month. No exaggeration.
But when I was in high school until now, I rarely have an accident. Yeah, sure I got hit by a car in second year high, I got a major wound which required four stitches on my right hand in my freshman year in college... But other than that, my catastrophic tendencies actually plummeted from 10 to 1. I don't think I've ever slipped during the rain (unless you count those that demands nothing but a small "Whoa!" from me).
That's why I don't think I remembered how painful it was going to be. One second I was looking at the door, the next second a loud gasp escaped from my throat as the world spun, a sharp pain coursed through my spine, and then, suddenly, I was looking at the sky, I couldn't breathe, my eyes stung, I felt drenched all over, and I didn't think I was going to be able to walk again.
Again, no exaggerations.
I swear, it was shock. Jason Mraz was singing the last chorus of "Who Needs Shelter" now. I was clutching my umbrella as if it were my lifeline, and, now that I look back, it was amazing that I was still, in fact, holding my umbrella. My jeans were drenched, but at least my shirt and my head weren't. I sat there for about 30 seconds, but it seriously felt like ages. I was able to get up eventually, but I felt numb all over. I made it to my mom's office without emitting a single sound.
I took a seat. All my mom had to say was "Hi" before tears of pain finally fell. I guess it's one of the things you just can't control after a moment of excruciating pain. I mean, sure, my back didn't hurt anymore, but feeling numb was still scary, even if I had been able to walk. Even now, several hours since my fall, my back's still numb. And I don't think it's because of the bowling I did this afternoon.
Yes, I went bowling with a couple of co-teachers and five German students, but only because I didn't want my day to end with a lousy slip. That was a good decision, too, because I had fun learning German, hitting two strikes, and giving a tour of the mall (here at SM, you've got it all~).
So...yeah. I think I'm gonna go sleep now. Ich bin müde.
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Sunday, August 07, 2005
Sleep, Chatter and Longest Ascending Substrings
My brain is practically pure mush right now.
After getting home from an awesome day at Gateway for Loraine's birthday last night, I tried to finish my homework that I had been working on for the last week, but I fell asleep on my notebook at 1:30 am, or at least I think it was 1:30 am because that was the last time on the clock I remember).
At 7 am this morning, I drag myself out of bed because I'm gonna be an usher at church today and I have to be there at 8am, and it was simply awesome that Pastor Edg preached in a really fun way so I didn't fall asleep -- actually, I was wide awake the whole service -- and mom and I were even talking animatedly over lunch about it at Pancake House (Pancake House Congressional, by the way, doesn't exactly make nice rice anymore).
Then, fighting the almost irresistable urge to lay my head on my soft, fluffy pillow and close my eyes because the weather outside is SO relxing, I TRY to go back to my homework, but I end up staring at the several pieces of paper in front of me for the next hour or so, until finally -- FINALLY -- I figure out how to do a divide and conquer algorithm with a running time of O(n-squared) for solving for the length of the longest ascending substring in an array of natural numbers!
As a reward for myself, I go online, only to remember that I'm not supposed to be rewarding myself yet because I have my groupmates' work to check still, but they haven't emailed me their work, so I just pray that they'll finish it before 10 pm tonight because I still have to check it before submitting it to my prof before midnight, or else we don't get any points for this problem set, which we can't afford because we already had a Zero mark on our first probset.
And since I only have one hour left for net time, which I have to save so I can go online again later tonight, I have to finish this now.
*sigh*
Hokay. I haven't been online for almost a week, so I'm doing chatterbox replies here instead of...well...there.
*ahem*
drea: wow, bigatin ka na tlga ha... =p
Hindi pa naman. 115 lbs. pa naman ako... XD Hehe.
aninel: naks astig! belated happy berday at pasensya kung hindi ko alam =( luv yah sa! mwahugz!
Belated? Next month pa berday ko! Kaw naman pinatatanda mo na ko kagad. T_T
betchai: HERE I AM... uhh.. ayos na.
...uh... Ang? Me is confused...
sara: XD rawk!
...Er...Hao? ^_^ Willy Wonka, Willy Wonka, the amazing chocolate cheer~ XD
aninel: hi sa! inggit kami ng kapatid ko sa zen mo! ano capacity niyan? and how much kung alam mo? hehehe and kung may ibang color??? =)
Yesh. Here are ze colourz:
It's 512 Mb. I bought it for P5999. I know because I'm the one paying 70% of the price. (Hehe. 30% lang yung regalo ng mom ko, but what the heck). Buy at ELECTROWORLD. Other shops in Cyberzone sells 'em at P7999, for some reason I cannot fathom. Be sure to canvas a LOT of shops before buying. I think Electroworld in Megamall has freebie Creative speakers, too, but I can't be sure.
So...yeah.
As I said, my brain is pure mush.
After getting home from an awesome day at Gateway for Loraine's birthday last night, I tried to finish my homework that I had been working on for the last week, but I fell asleep on my notebook at 1:30 am, or at least I think it was 1:30 am because that was the last time on the clock I remember).
At 7 am this morning, I drag myself out of bed because I'm gonna be an usher at church today and I have to be there at 8am, and it was simply awesome that Pastor Edg preached in a really fun way so I didn't fall asleep -- actually, I was wide awake the whole service -- and mom and I were even talking animatedly over lunch about it at Pancake House (Pancake House Congressional, by the way, doesn't exactly make nice rice anymore).
Then, fighting the almost irresistable urge to lay my head on my soft, fluffy pillow and close my eyes because the weather outside is SO relxing, I TRY to go back to my homework, but I end up staring at the several pieces of paper in front of me for the next hour or so, until finally -- FINALLY -- I figure out how to do a divide and conquer algorithm with a running time of O(n-squared) for solving for the length of the longest ascending substring in an array of natural numbers!
As a reward for myself, I go online, only to remember that I'm not supposed to be rewarding myself yet because I have my groupmates' work to check still, but they haven't emailed me their work, so I just pray that they'll finish it before 10 pm tonight because I still have to check it before submitting it to my prof before midnight, or else we don't get any points for this problem set, which we can't afford because we already had a Zero mark on our first probset.
And since I only have one hour left for net time, which I have to save so I can go online again later tonight, I have to finish this now.
*sigh*
Hokay. I haven't been online for almost a week, so I'm doing chatterbox replies here instead of...well...there.
*ahem*
Hindi pa naman. 115 lbs. pa naman ako... XD Hehe.
Belated? Next month pa berday ko! Kaw naman pinatatanda mo na ko kagad. T_T
...uh... Ang? Me is confused...
...Er...Hao? ^_^ Willy Wonka, Willy Wonka, the amazing chocolate cheer~ XD
Yesh. Here are ze colourz:
It's 512 Mb. I bought it for P5999. I know because I'm the one paying 70% of the price. (Hehe. 30% lang yung regalo ng mom ko, but what the heck). Buy at ELECTROWORLD. Other shops in Cyberzone sells 'em at P7999, for some reason I cannot fathom. Be sure to canvas a LOT of shops before buying. I think Electroworld in Megamall has freebie Creative speakers, too, but I can't be sure.
So...yeah.
As I said, my brain is pure mush.
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Friday, July 01, 2005
for the past two weeks...
..the Medical College of Georgia, in cooperation with Missions To The World, had free medical clinics in San Pedro (Laguna), Lipa (Batangas), Cembo (Makati), and Bagong Paraiso (Muntinlupa).
On tuesday three weeks ago, my mom was practically dragging me to sign up to be an interpreter for the doctors. She succeeded.
On monday two weeks ago, I was dragging my butt out of bed at 5 in the morning so we can go to the site.
Every day after that, I practically begged my mom to let me skip classes so I can come with them, even if they don't give me the allowance.
Here's why:
(1) I learned a LOT. I felt like I was a nursing student!
(2) It was SO encouraging to see people be touched by just a smile and a "God bless you!" Their faces would just light up and they would smile so brightly (not caring if their teeth weren't exactly perfect). It was so amazing. I never thought someone woul be so grateful to me just because I took their blood pressure...
(3) Seeing non-Filipinos care SO much about MY countrymen is SO rebuking. I mean, like, ouch. They travelled halfway around the world to reach out to Filipinos. Filipinos that REALLY need help. Filipinos that, on regular days, I would not even want to look at. And they did that for free. I got allowance, but they did it for free. Man.
(4) I made new friends. I made awesome friends. Oh my goodness. We only spent two weeks (8 days, actually) together, but I literally bawled my eyes out when they left.
So there. I want to write so much...but I think I should stop now, or I never will.
One word to summarize the last two weeks:
WOW.
for piccies, go to my photobucket and hope that I've uploaded the pics already :D
On tuesday three weeks ago, my mom was practically dragging me to sign up to be an interpreter for the doctors. She succeeded.
On monday two weeks ago, I was dragging my butt out of bed at 5 in the morning so we can go to the site.
Every day after that, I practically begged my mom to let me skip classes so I can come with them, even if they don't give me the allowance.
Here's why:
(1) I learned a LOT. I felt like I was a nursing student!
(2) It was SO encouraging to see people be touched by just a smile and a "God bless you!" Their faces would just light up and they would smile so brightly (not caring if their teeth weren't exactly perfect). It was so amazing. I never thought someone woul be so grateful to me just because I took their blood pressure...
(3) Seeing non-Filipinos care SO much about MY countrymen is SO rebuking. I mean, like, ouch. They travelled halfway around the world to reach out to Filipinos. Filipinos that REALLY need help. Filipinos that, on regular days, I would not even want to look at. And they did that for free. I got allowance, but they did it for free. Man.
(4) I made new friends. I made awesome friends. Oh my goodness. We only spent two weeks (8 days, actually) together, but I literally bawled my eyes out when they left.
So there. I want to write so much...but I think I should stop now, or I never will.
One word to summarize the last two weeks:
WOW.
for piccies, go to my photobucket and hope that I've uploaded the pics already :D
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Friday, June 03, 2005
i hate being sick.
...
'nuff said.
'nuff said.
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Monday, May 30, 2005
recently, i'm...
vacationing: No, not the "going to the beach!!!" type of vacationing. I've been working at the same time being a bum. Don't ask me to explain. That's how it is.
disconnected: I haven't been watching the TV much (not that I watched a lot before the vacation). And I haven't been online a lot, either.
disappointed: So now he suddenly shows interest. Ha.
running out of words: Well...not exactly. It's just that something weird is happening to my vocabulary recently. I KNOW I suddenly get a vocab-block often... but it's getting worse the past few days. Rargh. I can't freaking finish a sentence when I'm speaking.
jumping around with joy: I got permission to take the last course I have to... uh... take in Diliman! I gotta go back to LB on Tuesday to get my permit. Don't get me wrong: I LOVE Los Baños. It's just that it's really more convenient if I spend my last 5-unit sem here in QC.
tired: We stayed up tonight preparing for our family day/Amazing gRace thing we have tomorrow. *sigh* Last minute preparations and triple-checking is always stressful, for some reason. But at least I'm getting paid to do this Bwahahahah!
sick: Uh...yeah. Did I mention I have lots of stuff to do this week?
So why am I still up blogging instead of getting sleep before we leave in 5 hours?
Dunno.
disconnected: I haven't been watching the TV much (not that I watched a lot before the vacation). And I haven't been online a lot, either.
disappointed: So now he suddenly shows interest. Ha.
running out of words: Well...not exactly. It's just that something weird is happening to my vocabulary recently. I KNOW I suddenly get a vocab-block often... but it's getting worse the past few days. Rargh. I can't freaking finish a sentence when I'm speaking.
jumping around with joy: I got permission to take the last course I have to... uh... take in Diliman! I gotta go back to LB on Tuesday to get my permit. Don't get me wrong: I LOVE Los Baños. It's just that it's really more convenient if I spend my last 5-unit sem here in QC.
tired: We stayed up tonight preparing for our family day/Amazing gRace thing we have tomorrow. *sigh* Last minute preparations and triple-checking is always stressful, for some reason. But at least I'm getting paid to do this Bwahahahah!
sick: Uh...yeah. Did I mention I have lots of stuff to do this week?
So why am I still up blogging instead of getting sleep before we leave in 5 hours?
Dunno.
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Thursday, April 21, 2005
one-note samba
I wasn't trying to go to sleep yet, so I wasn't irritated. But I'm sure a handful of people were.
I was working on my PC last night (or was it the other night? It was April 19, about 10 p.m.), hoping to get rid of the migraine that still hadn't disappeared (ok, so it disappeared, but it kept coming back), when I decided to turn the speakers off. See, I'm the kind of person who likes the music IN my ears, not just near it (yeah, I know, I'm not making much sense). And, since I didn't want my music to disturb anyone, I rather turn it off than lower the volume. So I turn it off.
It was then that I heard a group of kids (boys, to be specific; around 10-15 years old, judging by their voices) singing. LOUD. With no accompaniment. OK, maybe they had an accompaniment, maybe a guitar, but I didn't hear it. And, goodness gracious, they were singing "Wag na Wag Mong Sasabihin" in one note. I mean, LITERALLY one note. The only variation is the volume they sang it. As I said, I wasn't irritated. As a matter of fact, I was amused with them because they sounded like they were really having a great time! And, I gotta hand it to them, though: their sense of rhythm and timing was pretty good.
They finished the song, and move on to the next one.
"Hindi Ako Bakla"
And they were singing with PASSION, ladies and gentlemen.
By this time, I was having a reeeeaaally hard time trying not to laugh too loud.
Here's the rest of their line-up:
- Totoy Bibbo
- Tuwing Umuulan at Kapiling Ka
- (that song by South Border for Mulawin)
- Noypi
The last one on their line-up was...
drum roll, please...
Let the Love Begin.
*ROFL!* Mhay ghulay! OK, so maybe I'd be laughing silly even if the song didn't have -ahem- another meaning for me. But, MAN. (Those who know my 'adventures' in PI100 know what I'm writing about.) It took a while before I stopped laughing into my pillow... And even then, I was grinning for the next half-hour.
Even now, I'm grinning.
By 11 p.m. my migraine was gone, and I was sleepy. So I decided to call it a night. Even now, I'm not sure what cured me: writing in my ever-lovable PC or the one-note samba (although, technically it wasn't a samba).
Haaay... Life. It's the best comedy ever produced.
I was working on my PC last night (or was it the other night? It was April 19, about 10 p.m.), hoping to get rid of the migraine that still hadn't disappeared (ok, so it disappeared, but it kept coming back), when I decided to turn the speakers off. See, I'm the kind of person who likes the music IN my ears, not just near it (yeah, I know, I'm not making much sense). And, since I didn't want my music to disturb anyone, I rather turn it off than lower the volume. So I turn it off.
It was then that I heard a group of kids (boys, to be specific; around 10-15 years old, judging by their voices) singing. LOUD. With no accompaniment. OK, maybe they had an accompaniment, maybe a guitar, but I didn't hear it. And, goodness gracious, they were singing "Wag na Wag Mong Sasabihin" in one note. I mean, LITERALLY one note. The only variation is the volume they sang it. As I said, I wasn't irritated. As a matter of fact, I was amused with them because they sounded like they were really having a great time! And, I gotta hand it to them, though: their sense of rhythm and timing was pretty good.
They finished the song, and move on to the next one.
"Hindi Ako Bakla"
And they were singing with PASSION, ladies and gentlemen.
By this time, I was having a reeeeaaally hard time trying not to laugh too loud.
Here's the rest of their line-up:
- Totoy Bibbo
- Tuwing Umuulan at Kapiling Ka
- (that song by South Border for Mulawin)
- Noypi
The last one on their line-up was...
drum roll, please...
Let the Love Begin.
*ROFL!* Mhay ghulay! OK, so maybe I'd be laughing silly even if the song didn't have -ahem- another meaning for me. But, MAN. (Those who know my 'adventures' in PI100 know what I'm writing about.) It took a while before I stopped laughing into my pillow... And even then, I was grinning for the next half-hour.
Even now, I'm grinning.
By 11 p.m. my migraine was gone, and I was sleepy. So I decided to call it a night. Even now, I'm not sure what cured me: writing in my ever-lovable PC or the one-note samba (although, technically it wasn't a samba).
Haaay... Life. It's the best comedy ever produced.
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Saturday, April 16, 2005
dig
WARNING: My mind is pretty unorganized right now (much like my room. it's chaos in there), so don't be surprised if I don't make any sense.
Before anything else, I'd like to make an utterly shameless plug.
Although I continually debate that my hand is not meant to draw anything properly proportional... http://fuyusarah.deviantart.com/
I'm a writer. If you like my work, drop a line. If you don't like my work, say something constructive. If you can't, shut up. http://www.fictionpress.com/~fuyusarah
No, I'm not trying to be hostile.
-ahem-
Aside from being a digital packrat, I am a packrat. Period.
Let's be cheesily clicheic, shall we? Life's one long journey, a road to somewhere, and crossroads are the places we meet people, and make decisions... blah, blah, blah. But, since nothing is forever, we ought to cherish each moment, engrave what we feel and see in every second, cherish it forver in our hearts... blah, blah, blah.
Fact # 1: My memory fails me sometimes. Don't you just hate it when you see or hear or smell something that "reminds" you of something, but you can't, forthe life of you, remember what that thing is? Don't you just hate it when you want to remember something, and you can't? And then, suddenly, when you're not trying to think about it anymore, you suddenly remember it! Grah.
Fact # 2: I used to have lots of space in my room, so I'm used to keeping stuff. As I always say, "This might be useful someday..." More often than not, I DO use those things. But that one time totally pales to the ten years that it was stored in my closet, don't you think?
Fact#3: I am a VERY sentimental person. I like flipping old pictures and little notes given to me (especially the ones in high school!) and I like reading through my old journals and seeing how my penmanship acutally improved when I thought it wasn't possible.
I was unpacking my things today. Another event worthy of being commented with a "FINALLY!" with a matching eye-roll and heavy sigh of relief.
Probelm is: I didn't finish fixing my stuff. Why? Because I have nowhere -- and I mean NOWHERE -- to put my stuff! See, most of my things have stayed in my dorm room FAR too long that they don't have their rightful places in my QC room anymore. Some of my belongings, I've never even taken to my room here in QC. But since I don't intend on keeping my stuff in two, big Jack 'n Jill Chippy boxes, I had to get to work.
The thing I hate most about cleaning my room is NOT the cleaning itself. As a matter of fact, I LOVE seeing things go from impossibly dirty to admirably neat (thus explaining why I love washing dishes). It's not the act of weeding my room, either. It's the decision-making that I hate. I hate needing to decide which things to throw away, because, honestly, if I keep the things I want to keep and throw away the things I don't want to keep, I NEVER get to throw ANYTHING away. It takes a reeeeeaaaly strong decision (or a pretty impulsive one) for me to actually discard things.
The thing I love most, on the other hand, is seeing the small, trvial things that can actually count as useless. Like, for example, I saw my 'files' from my freshman year. I kept every single bluebook I used. (And not one was crupolyed nor creased. WOW.) I had a really hard time convincing myself that I didn't need those things anymore because I had classcards to prove that I did well that year.
So I threw 'em away.
'Cept I kept one (just one, I swear) of the Math 17 quizzes I had that got a perfect score. See, my teacher put smileys on perfect quizzes. As pre-schooly as it may sound, I thought it was cute. And since I'm laughing about it now, I bet I'd be laughing about it in 20 years. Notice the bold letters.
Oh, and I also kept a few other 1.0 papers I got in several other subjects... I mean, let's face it: my academic performance in terms of the grades didn't exactly soar into the sky (it slid down, acutally). So forgive me for stubbornly holding on to the few moments of glory that I had.
But, as we all know, grades aren't really so important once you're in the real world. Sometimes I wonder how many failing grades successful people had when they were in college...
Speaking of successful people, I was in the presence of greatness this evening. And I'm not talking about former UP President Nemenzo sitting next to me. I'm talkin' bout the jazz band in Silungan. MAN. *worship* I cannot elaborate because I'll most likely just type incoherent words of awe.
...
OK, I was supposed to write a LOT today, but suddenly I can't remember else I had planned to write...
See what I mean about my memory?
Before anything else, I'd like to make an utterly shameless plug.
Although I continually debate that my hand is not meant to draw anything properly proportional... http://fuyusarah.deviantart.com/
I'm a writer. If you like my work, drop a line. If you don't like my work, say something constructive. If you can't, shut up. http://www.fictionpress.com/~fuyusarah
No, I'm not trying to be hostile.
-ahem-
Aside from being a digital packrat, I am a packrat. Period.
Let's be cheesily clicheic, shall we? Life's one long journey, a road to somewhere, and crossroads are the places we meet people, and make decisions... blah, blah, blah. But, since nothing is forever, we ought to cherish each moment, engrave what we feel and see in every second, cherish it forver in our hearts... blah, blah, blah.
Fact # 1: My memory fails me sometimes. Don't you just hate it when you see or hear or smell something that "reminds" you of something, but you can't, forthe life of you, remember what that thing is? Don't you just hate it when you want to remember something, and you can't? And then, suddenly, when you're not trying to think about it anymore, you suddenly remember it! Grah.
Fact # 2: I used to have lots of space in my room, so I'm used to keeping stuff. As I always say, "This might be useful someday..." More often than not, I DO use those things. But that one time totally pales to the ten years that it was stored in my closet, don't you think?
Fact#3: I am a VERY sentimental person. I like flipping old pictures and little notes given to me (especially the ones in high school!) and I like reading through my old journals and seeing how my penmanship acutally improved when I thought it wasn't possible.
I was unpacking my things today. Another event worthy of being commented with a "FINALLY!" with a matching eye-roll and heavy sigh of relief.
Probelm is: I didn't finish fixing my stuff. Why? Because I have nowhere -- and I mean NOWHERE -- to put my stuff! See, most of my things have stayed in my dorm room FAR too long that they don't have their rightful places in my QC room anymore. Some of my belongings, I've never even taken to my room here in QC. But since I don't intend on keeping my stuff in two, big Jack 'n Jill Chippy boxes, I had to get to work.
The thing I hate most about cleaning my room is NOT the cleaning itself. As a matter of fact, I LOVE seeing things go from impossibly dirty to admirably neat (thus explaining why I love washing dishes). It's not the act of weeding my room, either. It's the decision-making that I hate. I hate needing to decide which things to throw away, because, honestly, if I keep the things I want to keep and throw away the things I don't want to keep, I NEVER get to throw ANYTHING away. It takes a reeeeeaaaly strong decision (or a pretty impulsive one) for me to actually discard things.
The thing I love most, on the other hand, is seeing the small, trvial things that can actually count as useless. Like, for example, I saw my 'files' from my freshman year. I kept every single bluebook I used. (And not one was crupolyed nor creased. WOW.) I had a really hard time convincing myself that I didn't need those things anymore because I had classcards to prove that I did well that year.
So I threw 'em away.
'Cept I kept one (just one, I swear) of the Math 17 quizzes I had that got a perfect score. See, my teacher put smileys on perfect quizzes. As pre-schooly as it may sound, I thought it was cute. And since I'm laughing about it now, I bet I'd be laughing about it in 20 years. Notice the bold letters.
Oh, and I also kept a few other 1.0 papers I got in several other subjects... I mean, let's face it: my academic performance in terms of the grades didn't exactly soar into the sky (it slid down, acutally). So forgive me for stubbornly holding on to the few moments of glory that I had.
But, as we all know, grades aren't really so important once you're in the real world. Sometimes I wonder how many failing grades successful people had when they were in college...
Speaking of successful people, I was in the presence of greatness this evening. And I'm not talking about former UP President Nemenzo sitting next to me. I'm talkin' bout the jazz band in Silungan. MAN. *worship* I cannot elaborate because I'll most likely just type incoherent words of awe.
...
OK, I was supposed to write a LOT today, but suddenly I can't remember else I had planned to write...
See what I mean about my memory?
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Monday, March 07, 2005
Melting Pot
My concept of six degrees of separation has been taken to the next level.
Just a disclaimer before anything else: I did NOT invent that concept.
My brother Ace works at Pulp magazine. As of today, I shall call his office "The Melting Pot".
(1) When he got his job, he ended up working with Luis, one of my *other* brother's (Jabes) closes friends from high school. That's...26 years ago, when he graduated from Pisay. Their group called 'Utol' still met regularly for frisbee games and gimiks.
(2) Kuya Ace's drummer's girlfriend, Bernie, works at Pulp, too. She happens to be Kuya Jabes' friend, too, from one of his old "offices" (he doesn't *have* an office as a freelance stage manager...).
(3) Bernie knows James. James is the keyboardist in Kuya Tim's (my third brother) band.
(4) 'k... Lemme write something that could be an exerpt for my next novel -- which is coming out in 20 years. harhar -- right here:
-------------
The scene opens in my room, Saturday morning. I had just gotten home from LB when Kuya Ace knocks on my door.
"Hey, doin' anything?"
"Not really," I say as he goes to lie down on my bed and fiddle with the stuff on my headboard. This is the obvious sign that he's just hanging around in my room for no reason. So I just let him be as I fix my things from my bag and onto my desk.
"Hey," he said again, "someone at the office knows you."
I felt one of my eyebrows involuntarily rise as I totally expected him to suddenly laugh and yell, "Psych!"
He didn't.
"Oh?" I said. To me, it was highly unlikely.
"Yeah. He was playing something Japanese in the office. I asked him what it was, and...it was something I didn't know. Obviously."
"Obviously."
"I told him my sister likes anime, too...And you like this singer...Otadu...or something."
"Utada."
"Right. And he goes, 'ah, right, right...'"
A pause.
"And?"
"And he asks me what my sister's name was. I said Sarah. And he goes, 'O~h, so Sarah's your sister?'"
"... Well, duh. Didn't you just tell him that?"
"Yeah, but he goes, 'Sarah as in the tall girl wearing glasses and has a friend named Sara, too? And they attended Quezon City Science High?'"
OK. That was accurate to the point of being scary.
"So..." I said, "his name is...?"
"Charles Tan."
"..."
-------------
My goodness. I hadn't seen Charles forever, and there he was the whole time, working with my brother. I said it once, I said it twice, I said it a gazillion times.
And I'll say it again: SMALL WORLD.
Just a disclaimer before anything else: I did NOT invent that concept.
My brother Ace works at Pulp magazine. As of today, I shall call his office "The Melting Pot".
(1) When he got his job, he ended up working with Luis, one of my *other* brother's (Jabes) closes friends from high school. That's...26 years ago, when he graduated from Pisay. Their group called 'Utol' still met regularly for frisbee games and gimiks.
(2) Kuya Ace's drummer's girlfriend, Bernie, works at Pulp, too. She happens to be Kuya Jabes' friend, too, from one of his old "offices" (he doesn't *have* an office as a freelance stage manager...).
(3) Bernie knows James. James is the keyboardist in Kuya Tim's (my third brother) band.
(4) 'k... Lemme write something that could be an exerpt for my next novel -- which is coming out in 20 years. harhar -- right here:
-------------
The scene opens in my room, Saturday morning. I had just gotten home from LB when Kuya Ace knocks on my door.
"Hey, doin' anything?"
"Not really," I say as he goes to lie down on my bed and fiddle with the stuff on my headboard. This is the obvious sign that he's just hanging around in my room for no reason. So I just let him be as I fix my things from my bag and onto my desk.
"Hey," he said again, "someone at the office knows you."
I felt one of my eyebrows involuntarily rise as I totally expected him to suddenly laugh and yell, "Psych!"
He didn't.
"Oh?" I said. To me, it was highly unlikely.
"Yeah. He was playing something Japanese in the office. I asked him what it was, and...it was something I didn't know. Obviously."
"Obviously."
"I told him my sister likes anime, too...And you like this singer...Otadu...or something."
"Utada."
"Right. And he goes, 'ah, right, right...'"
A pause.
"And?"
"And he asks me what my sister's name was. I said Sarah. And he goes, 'O~h, so Sarah's your sister?'"
"... Well, duh. Didn't you just tell him that?"
"Yeah, but he goes, 'Sarah as in the tall girl wearing glasses and has a friend named Sara, too? And they attended Quezon City Science High?'"
OK. That was accurate to the point of being scary.
"So..." I said, "his name is...?"
"Charles Tan."
"..."
-------------
My goodness. I hadn't seen Charles forever, and there he was the whole time, working with my brother. I said it once, I said it twice, I said it a gazillion times.
And I'll say it again: SMALL WORLD.
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Sunday, February 20, 2005
Timing
I hate this.
Despite general knowledge, I have the capability to get a crush. Yeah. Though I --most often than not-- do NOT want to get a crush on anybody, I am but a girl. And you know what's worse than getting a crush? It's almost everybody else telling you that the two of you are a perfect match. You know what's worse than that? It's him telling you that he has a crush on somebody else. And you know what's even worse than that? It's him telling you practically every week how he likes 'her' even more everyday.
Sheesh, that sounds like a cheesy song, do'n't it?
I know I have no reason to get angry at him, because, hey! it's not like he's mine or anything (not that he's anybody else's either). And, take note, I am not angry at him. No, I'm not in denial. I'm truly not angry at him. I'm angry at myself for being angry at the situation.
*sigh*
The ironies of life just have to be so ironic, don't they?
Don't worry, I won't be in a depressed mode forever just because of a little crush. I suppose my only consolation is this: if it's not him, then somebody else better is out there for me, and when the right time for me to commit to someone finally comes, life is going to be awesome.
I love my life.
Despite general knowledge, I have the capability to get a crush. Yeah. Though I --most often than not-- do NOT want to get a crush on anybody, I am but a girl. And you know what's worse than getting a crush? It's almost everybody else telling you that the two of you are a perfect match. You know what's worse than that? It's him telling you that he has a crush on somebody else. And you know what's even worse than that? It's him telling you practically every week how he likes 'her' even more everyday.
Sheesh, that sounds like a cheesy song, do'n't it?
I know I have no reason to get angry at him, because, hey! it's not like he's mine or anything (not that he's anybody else's either). And, take note, I am not angry at him. No, I'm not in denial. I'm truly not angry at him. I'm angry at myself for being angry at the situation.
*sigh*
The ironies of life just have to be so ironic, don't they?
Don't worry, I won't be in a depressed mode forever just because of a little crush. I suppose my only consolation is this: if it's not him, then somebody else better is out there for me, and when the right time for me to commit to someone finally comes, life is going to be awesome.
I love my life.
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Thursday, February 03, 2005
"little princess"
"It's simple, fun and can be slightly addictive..."
That is SO true. I found myself typing all my friends' names. Haha!
http://www.birthdayalarm.com/name
Side note: Pauline is the 446th in the 1990s! o.O At least half of my name is pretty unique ^____^
I LOVE my name.
That is SO true. I found myself typing all my friends' names. Haha!
http://www.birthdayalarm.com/name
 | | | | |
 | Sarah - Means: Princess | |||
| Decade | Popularity | Rank | ||
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1900's |
| 46 | ||
| 1910's |
| 52 | ||
| 1920's |
| 59 | ||
| 1930's |
| 62 | ||
| 1940's |
| 75 | ||
| 1950's |
| 109 | ||
| 1960's |
| 91 | ||
| 1970's |
| 18 | ||
| 1980's |
| 5 | ||
| 1990's |
| 4 | ||
Side note: Pauline is the 446th in the 1990s! o.O At least half of my name is pretty unique ^____^
I LOVE my name.
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Sunday, January 30, 2005
Comparison
I flipped through my old journal this morning, and I felt totally rebuked by my old self. Seriously. Most of the writings there were about my "adventures" as I "struggled" with academics, but now that I look at my grades, I actually did pretty well!
Man, the discontent I had then simply amazes me. I was striving to be much better because I knew I could do better.
Other writings included my ministry at church. I wsa more active in church then than I am now, and I was still doing great in acads?! ... Was that even me?
Of course, anime was still present along with my ramblings as a webmistress, but they were just the side notes...small, random rants or raves inserted in between the real content of the entry. Whole entries about anime was a rare case.
It really struck me how focused I was then. I knew what I was doing, what I was supposed to be doing, and when to do it. And I DID it on schedule. You can't justify that blogging, writing on my journal, or Blue Star, for that matter, was a distraction because, at that time, I wrote practically every day, and I there were always little snippets about Blue Star updates (and new about my sites, sometimes).
But don't get me wrong, my self-esteem isn't plummeting into oblivion. I still think I'm a better person now than I was before. I maintain that I learn something new everyday. I just have to reassess my priorities and realign it with God's. There are several aspects in my life I have to change, fix, or maybe even "System Restore".
My devotional today tackled getting deployed in the battlefield. That when we become Christians, when I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, I had enlisted to be in His Army (whereas, before, I was a civillian that the Dark Side is trying to steal from Heaven). I realized that I haven't been on the battlefield lately. I was under the tree, resting in the shade, pretending to have fainted, but am actually chatting with the medic.
What we had studied in PI100 about biographies was accurate, I reckon. That you can take a successul person's biography and study it so you can be like her. In my case right now, I am the reader, and the successful person is my sophomore self. The only difference is I don't study the successful person't life. Instead, I examine it to surpass her.
if I offended anyone, sorry na lang.
Man, the discontent I had then simply amazes me. I was striving to be much better because I knew I could do better.
Other writings included my ministry at church. I wsa more active in church then than I am now, and I was still doing great in acads?! ... Was that even me?
Of course, anime was still present along with my ramblings as a webmistress, but they were just the side notes...small, random rants or raves inserted in between the real content of the entry. Whole entries about anime was a rare case.
It really struck me how focused I was then. I knew what I was doing, what I was supposed to be doing, and when to do it. And I DID it on schedule. You can't justify that blogging, writing on my journal, or Blue Star, for that matter, was a distraction because, at that time, I wrote practically every day, and I there were always little snippets about Blue Star updates (and new about my sites, sometimes).
But don't get me wrong, my self-esteem isn't plummeting into oblivion. I still think I'm a better person now than I was before. I maintain that I learn something new everyday. I just have to reassess my priorities and realign it with God's. There are several aspects in my life I have to change, fix, or maybe even "System Restore".
My devotional today tackled getting deployed in the battlefield. That when we become Christians, when I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, I had enlisted to be in His Army (whereas, before, I was a civillian that the Dark Side is trying to steal from Heaven). I realized that I haven't been on the battlefield lately. I was under the tree, resting in the shade, pretending to have fainted, but am actually chatting with the medic.
What we had studied in PI100 about biographies was accurate, I reckon. That you can take a successul person's biography and study it so you can be like her. In my case right now, I am the reader, and the successful person is my sophomore self. The only difference is I don't study the successful person't life. Instead, I examine it to surpass her.
if I offended anyone, sorry na lang.
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Saturday, January 22, 2005
Ownership
For the first time since classes started this year, I was actually in my room.
The first weekend, I didn't come home. The second, I came home, but i didn't feel like I did becuase I was alone working practically the whole time. And today, I actually got to lie down on my bed and enjoy, unlike what I did last week. What I did then was more like crash down on the bed rather than lie down.
Every time (and I mean every time) I enter my room when I get home from LB, what I see surprises me. See, when I leave for LB on Mondays, my room is, more often than not, in disarray. It's not in total chaos, but it's not perfectly clean and tidy, either. But when I return on Saturdays, it's ALWAYS clean and tidy to the point of bareness. Now, don't get me wrong: I appreciate that our househelp clean my stuff, but honestly... I'd rather they didn't, for several reasons.
First of all, we are all individuals meaning our logic is unique, some being more different than others. Therefore, I have a way of "fixing" my things. Though my stuff may look as if they were little lost children trying to find their way home in my *humungous* kingdom of a room, I know where I find things. Sure, some little items get misplaced every once in a while, but at least I have an idea where to look for them. But when other people clean my room for me without my permission... Aiya. I'm going to be the little lost girl.
Secondly, my room represents who I am. Because I'm not OC about being clean and tidy, my room is what I'd call "lived in". So if somebody else were to rearrange my stuff, then my abode would've lost its identity.
Third, it's my room. Mine. I take care of my things because they're my things. So, no matter how careful somebody else may be, they won't be as catious about my things as I would be.
Like, maybe I'd be more careful with the bowl I received on New Year's day...That ever-so-cool bowl with the holes for the chopsticks. MY bowl. I'd definitely be careful with it enough NOT to break it before I even got use it.
Also, I'd be careful with the nice brown-paged, unruled notebook I got myself on Christmas. MY notebook. Maybe I wouldn't get it all dirty because the cover was not waterproof, so I couldn't wash dirt off. And I'd most probably be careful with its "latch" because that's what makes it so nice. I wouldn't pull on it so it'd break off even before I got to write anything on it.
...
GAAAAAH!!!!!!
...
The keyword here, my friends, is ownership. "If it's not yours, be carerful with it", my mom always said. "If you can't be careful with it, leave it alone." The truth is I appreciate our househelp for the work she does, but... the recent side effects are proving to be a test to my patience.
And seriously, I want to start locking my room everytime I left for LB.
The first weekend, I didn't come home. The second, I came home, but i didn't feel like I did becuase I was alone working practically the whole time. And today, I actually got to lie down on my bed and enjoy, unlike what I did last week. What I did then was more like crash down on the bed rather than lie down.
Every time (and I mean every time) I enter my room when I get home from LB, what I see surprises me. See, when I leave for LB on Mondays, my room is, more often than not, in disarray. It's not in total chaos, but it's not perfectly clean and tidy, either. But when I return on Saturdays, it's ALWAYS clean and tidy to the point of bareness. Now, don't get me wrong: I appreciate that our househelp clean my stuff, but honestly... I'd rather they didn't, for several reasons.
First of all, we are all individuals meaning our logic is unique, some being more different than others. Therefore, I have a way of "fixing" my things. Though my stuff may look as if they were little lost children trying to find their way home in my *humungous* kingdom of a room, I know where I find things. Sure, some little items get misplaced every once in a while, but at least I have an idea where to look for them. But when other people clean my room for me without my permission... Aiya. I'm going to be the little lost girl.
Secondly, my room represents who I am. Because I'm not OC about being clean and tidy, my room is what I'd call "lived in". So if somebody else were to rearrange my stuff, then my abode would've lost its identity.
Third, it's my room. Mine. I take care of my things because they're my things. So, no matter how careful somebody else may be, they won't be as catious about my things as I would be.
Like, maybe I'd be more careful with the bowl I received on New Year's day...That ever-so-cool bowl with the holes for the chopsticks. MY bowl. I'd definitely be careful with it enough NOT to break it before I even got use it.
Also, I'd be careful with the nice brown-paged, unruled notebook I got myself on Christmas. MY notebook. Maybe I wouldn't get it all dirty because the cover was not waterproof, so I couldn't wash dirt off. And I'd most probably be careful with its "latch" because that's what makes it so nice. I wouldn't pull on it so it'd break off even before I got to write anything on it.
...
GAAAAAH!!!!!!
...
The keyword here, my friends, is ownership. "If it's not yours, be carerful with it", my mom always said. "If you can't be careful with it, leave it alone." The truth is I appreciate our househelp for the work she does, but... the recent side effects are proving to be a test to my patience.
And seriously, I want to start locking my room everytime I left for LB.
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Sunday, January 02, 2005
Namae wa...
Ironic how names stick.
I am currently chatting with two friends over Yahoo! Messenger. And I am also currently uploading pictures in my photobucket. I got some pics of our group (me, Ame, Mi-chan and Loraine) up, and I was thinking what to name that folder. My memory flashes back to high school.
A couple of people called us "mga anime".
*shrudder*
My goodness! That sounded cheesy then, it sounds WAY cheesier now. But -- to my dismay -- the name stuck. Not that we used it, mind you. But when our class in high school has get-togethers, those "few people" still call us that.
Even now that I'm not as much of a fanatic I was before (though I still am a fan), people who knew me in high school half-expect me to jump up and down if the conversation was about anything anime. And, to their disappointment, I don't.
Odd. I mean, I have been in college for four years now. And for four years, my classmates have heard me say "No, I am not going to jump up and down." Still, they can't seem to get it. Sure, I still get excited because of anime at times. But it totally pales to the peak of my otakudom when I become almost insanely hyperactive at practically every chance I get. Oh, well... Their thinking of me still being an otaku is fine, I suppose. And I guess they just wanted something shorter to say than "Sara/h, Beth and Loraine".
But... "mga anime"?!
Yeeesh... Spare me.
So I ended up calling it "otaku", which is a Japanese term for "fanatic", used by non-Japanese anime fans to call themselves. In Japan it strikes somewhat a negative note. But almost everywhere else (or at least in places where there are other anime fans) it's just something fans call themselves.
Even though I'm technically not an otaku anymore --- although, you can say I'm a veteran otaku...yikes, makes me sound old --- the name stuck. Maybe it's just easier to say than "anime fan".
Same banana.
Maybe names simply have glue on them...
It's one of those unavoidable things in life you just wished didn't exist. But then you can do nothing but just roll your eyes and live with it.
I am currently chatting with two friends over Yahoo! Messenger. And I am also currently uploading pictures in my photobucket. I got some pics of our group (me, Ame, Mi-chan and Loraine) up, and I was thinking what to name that folder. My memory flashes back to high school.
A couple of people called us "mga anime".
*shrudder*
My goodness! That sounded cheesy then, it sounds WAY cheesier now. But -- to my dismay -- the name stuck. Not that we used it, mind you. But when our class in high school has get-togethers, those "few people" still call us that.
Even now that I'm not as much of a fanatic I was before (though I still am a fan), people who knew me in high school half-expect me to jump up and down if the conversation was about anything anime. And, to their disappointment, I don't.
Odd. I mean, I have been in college for four years now. And for four years, my classmates have heard me say "No, I am not going to jump up and down." Still, they can't seem to get it. Sure, I still get excited because of anime at times. But it totally pales to the peak of my otakudom when I become almost insanely hyperactive at practically every chance I get. Oh, well... Their thinking of me still being an otaku is fine, I suppose. And I guess they just wanted something shorter to say than "Sara/h, Beth and Loraine".
But... "mga anime"?!
Yeeesh... Spare me.
So I ended up calling it "otaku", which is a Japanese term for "fanatic", used by non-Japanese anime fans to call themselves. In Japan it strikes somewhat a negative note. But almost everywhere else (or at least in places where there are other anime fans) it's just something fans call themselves.
Even though I'm technically not an otaku anymore --- although, you can say I'm a veteran otaku...yikes, makes me sound old --- the name stuck. Maybe it's just easier to say than "anime fan".
Same banana.
Maybe names simply have glue on them...
It's one of those unavoidable things in life you just wished didn't exist. But then you can do nothing but just roll your eyes and live with it.
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Saturday, September 04, 2004
melting
I had actually anticipated this. I was probably just thinking of trying it. Of stretching myself. Of seeing how far I can go. Of how far I WILL go. But, really. I'm freaking tired. Twenty academic units + Special Problem + a bunch of extracurricular activities (but important and worthwhile, I tell ya) = me DESPERATELY longing for sleep. One would wonder when a snowflake would melt.
Today is my brithday, actually. And, to tell you honestly, I had a GREAT morning, what with two surprise parties since last night. But I'm just TIRED, man! It's probably BECAUSE of the two parties. I didn't get sleep, after all, and I even travelled to QC from LB this morning.
It could be called academic suicide, or maybe a leap of faith. Seriously, I'm seeing myself melting. But the odd thing is: I'm not panicking yet. Well, not seriously anyway.
I'm starting to wonder when I will...
Today is my brithday, actually. And, to tell you honestly, I had a GREAT morning, what with two surprise parties since last night. But I'm just TIRED, man! It's probably BECAUSE of the two parties. I didn't get sleep, after all, and I even travelled to QC from LB this morning.
It could be called academic suicide, or maybe a leap of faith. Seriously, I'm seeing myself melting. But the odd thing is: I'm not panicking yet. Well, not seriously anyway.
I'm starting to wonder when I will...
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